Write That

Today's prompt: Sample of your handwriting

 And with that, I think I'm all caught up! (Back pain is still sticking around though. Argh.)

Dream City

Today's prompt: Somewhere you'd like to move or visit

London. It's one of my fave cities in the world. I've visited a few times and each time I've loved it more. I have looked into moving there (and have applied to some jobs as well), but it'd still be a few years off. I have pets, and the research I've done so far makes moving them seem very complicated AND expensive. I have total faith that it's going to happen, though.

What are your favorite cities? Why? Have any of you made any big moves? 

Get To Work

Today's prompt: If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?

I wish I would have read all these prompts more closely before I started this challenge. Some of them are not my favorite. I think I've written enough about my job, my search for a new job, etc. so this is what I have to say on this topic:

Life's to short for "could"s.

If you want your "dream" job, go out and try your damnedest to get it. No one is just going to give it to you, but the universe will absolutely help you out if you make the effort.

And that doesn't just go for jobs. You want to live in a certain city? Figure out a way. Go on a date with your crush? Ask them out. No joke, I moved across the country with four days of planning. I didn't have a job when I got there and holy sh*t did I have to work hard to get one. I networked, signed up at a temp agency, worked all my contacts, and applied for literally every job online. It took a few weeks, but I made it happen. The seven years that followed were the best of my adult life.

At the time, it was so scary, but looking back on that period I'm so proud of myself. It's made me see that in order for me to have as big of a life as I'd like I sometimes have to say yes first and figure out my way after. It's taught me to believe that I'm capable of anything I want.

You can do more than you think. I promise. Let me know how it turns out!!

xo, me

I'd Eat That

Today's prompt: Favorite foods and why

Guac. Do I really need to say more? Really, avocados in any form - except that chocolate pudding made with them. I just can't do it. It just seems like it'd ruin them.


Swedish Kanelbullar. Make these: http://www.scandikitchen.co.uk/recipe-the-best-cinnamon-buns/ 

You'll thank me.

Swedes love their fika (Swedish for coffee break) and these sweet rolls are a big part of that. The cardamom in the dough that smells like my childhood. I could eat them every day for the rest of my life with no complaints. They're that good.




These Airheads. It's my go-to candy when I'm working. Are any of you like that? I need to have something to pick at at my desk. I wish I didn't like them so much because they're def not the healthiest option.






Baby shell pasta with spinach and ricotta. Another favorite from my childhood. It's my total comfort food.

I Hate That

Today's prompt: Your top 5 pet peeves

I have a feeling this one is going be easy ;)

1) CHEWING NOISES
Nothing grosses me out more than mastication. It's disgusting. If I hear chewing, I gag and want to throw up. I even stick my fingers in my ears. And if it's at a meal, I literally can't eat another bit because it makes me so nauseous.

2) Liars
I think this one needs no explanation.

3) Cowardice
Same as above.

4) The word "moist"
It skeeves me out big time.

5) People who leave their coffee pod in the machine for someone else to throw away
Why you gotta be so lazy, man? I just think this is the rudest thing a coworker can do.

Dating Sucks

I'm officially behind. I pulled a muscle in my back and haven't done much for the last two days because any movement  - even typing - hurts. Please pray it gets better soon. I'm getting super frustrated because my to-do list is long and I can't do a darn thing right now.

Today's prompt: Your current relationship

Ha. It also says if you're single, discuss that.

I'm not quite sure there's a lot to say? This is the first time in my adult life that I've ever not dated at all. The first time I'm not even thinking about dating. If I'm being totally 100% honest the last thing I want is to be in a relationship right now, but  I would never say that out loud. I wish that were different, but it's just... not.

Sometimes I think it's my subconscious wanting to go back to California. It doesn't want me to be tied down here. But, then there are other times when I think that's just an excuse to not put myself out there. And the rest of the time I'm just to exhausted to care. Until that changes, I'm going to go it alone.

I've been single for about two years now - since I moved back to Chicago. I went out a few dates with one of my high school boyfriends when I first came back to town and it didn't go so well. He was perfectly nice on paper, but there was a lot of weird happening under the surface and it really scared me.

Here is the moment when I should have realized that it was doomed: If a grown man in his late 30s is angrily telling you how you breaking up with him when you were 14 ruined the next three years of his life while simultaneously forgetting that you were that relationship, run. (No joke, this happened. In a very romantic, fancy restaurant he got super bitter and spit wine when talking about a bad breakup he went through. I had to stop him and say, "I remember. It was when we broke up." He shut up pretty fast after that. It left me wondering if that is his standard bad relationship story that he tells dates to garner sympathy and just forgot that it was me? )

The Ugly Truth

Today's prompt: Describe the good, the bad, and the ugly of yourself

Okay, Sergio Leone. Let's just dive in, I guess ;)

What's good about me? I'm a loyal friend. If I love you, I'm your biggest champion/defender and will do anything for you. It's also a quality I highly value in others.

Another thing that I really appreciate about myself is that I'm calm under pressure. Bleeding in the street? Come find me. If you're loyal, I'll totally take care of you ;)

I didn't know that I possessed this quality until I was in a terrible accident. (People were actually bleeding in the street so I prob shouldn't have made that joke.) I truly believe that you can't know if you have that level of calm inside you unless you're put in that type of situation. It was horrible, but it gave me a newfound confidence in myself that I'd be able to handle anything life threw at me. I'm sad it happened, but grateful for the knowledge it brought.

Now, onto the bad. I'm stubborn as f&*!. And I question EVERYTHING. If something doesn't make sense to me (as in I think it's dumb/wrong), good luck at trying to get me to do it. (If it actually doesn't make sense to me I ask more questions, obvs.) I'm not saying I love this aspect of myself, but it's a big part of who I am.

And finally, the ugly. I am Arya Stark with her kill list. I can hold a grudge like no one else. It takes  A LOT for me to get that angry, but once I do... It's a cold, patient anger that sticks around for a long time.

I also never take the first item on a shelf in stores - I always have to reach for one in the back. So if you see me in Target, I'll apologize in advance.

xo, me

Long time, no post.

Hi.

I miss blogging. I think about it every day, but never quite manage to sit down and do it. I try to convince myself that it's because I do other creative work, but deep down I know it's just me being lazy. So, in effort to relaunch it I decided to do a 30 day blogging challenge.

Nothing fancy or intense - I just Googled and found one that had some good prompts (i.e. not "What's the meaning behind your blog's name?"). Hopefully, writing everyday will force me to fall into a routine. I'd like this space to be something beautiful and need to spend more time here to make that happen. So, here I go...

Today's Prompt: What, why, and where I write

I  write my feelings. About... everything, really. Deep emotional stuff, product reviews, tv/movie opinions. A random smattering, if you will. (Isn't smattering a great word? Note to self: Use "smattering" more often.)

Why do I write? Truthfully? If I didn't write all these thoughts down my head would explode. Or, at least that's what I imagine would happen.

Where do I write? Anywhere and everywhere. Mostly, I write at my office's conference table or at my desk in my living room at home. I work better at home, though.

That's it for Day 1! See you tomorrow!

xo,
me

Holiday Gift Guide - My Etsy Faves

Here’s something you might not know about me. I am a secret Etsy shopper. Not “secret” like I wouldn’t tell you if you asked, but somehow it ends up being something that never really gets talked about. Even though I knit, I’m not all that crafty and I initially thought of the site as an online space for garage sale stuff and tea cozies. (Disclaimer: I don’t know what I tea cozie is, but it sounded like the right thing to say there…) I couldn’t have been more wrong!

Here are four of my fave places to shop in the Etsy marketplace. I’ve ordered from two of the stores multiple times, and the the other two were so impressive that I’ll definitely order from them again. I hope they help you find some unique holiday gifts.

RIPLEY WEAR

If you have pets, you NEED these collars!! I like the classic plaid ones best, but she has loads of patterns to choose from. I’ve ordered from Natalie three times now (9 collars total) and all of them have been of amazing quality. They are softer and seem lighter than collars you can find in stores, and have never ripped or broken open on us. The Glitter Pups and Kittens love them! 

f

TINY COTTAGE DESIGNS

I’ve ordered three necklaces from Tiny Cottage. All have been beautiful, delicate little pieces of art. No joke - I think I’ve worn this bee necklace every day for six months. It’s just perfect.

TAGS BY HOLLY

I couldn’t believe that this didn’t exist before I ordered it. Because I love Clueless, I really wanted a keychain that says, “You’re a virgin who can’t drive.” Holly stamped it for me and it turned out so well. On top of that, her prices are so reasonable I want to order personalized gifts for everyone on my holiday gift list!

KOVERED 

I cannot say enough good things about my iPad case. It’s so beautiful. So practical. So strong. This shop has great customer service, have green initiatives (they plant trees and fully recyclable packaging), and their products just look so GORGEOUS. 

Lost & Found

Lost. Most days I just feel lost. I was certainly not living a perfect life in LA, but I’m finding it very hard to make any life progress here at home. Even simple tasks seem fraught with drama and it’s making me paralyzed, unable to move forward or even breathe. I feel like everything I had pushed away or thought I had gotten over is popping up all over the place and it hurts. It's scary.

The hard truth is I was happier in California. I was more myself there. I can say that here in this space, something I definitely can’t do in my everyday life. They’re so freaking happy I’m home, and they assume I’m happy too. Don’t get me wrong - I am happy, I guess? Or, maybe a better word for what I’m feeling is grateful? I’m grateful I can help my mother, I’m grateful I’m getting to see everyone’s kids grow up, I’m grateful to experience seasons again.

But finding the right job in this city? Much more challenging than I thought. Finding the things I like to do? Food I want to eat? Really hard. I spend so much time worrying about hurting the people I love and how to not blow through my savings that there’s no time to think about the future. My future. Here.  

Part of the problem is that I think I assumed it’d all be so simple. That I’d fit right back into my old life with ease. But I’m a different person than I was when I left. This life is an old wool sweater - super comfy, but a little tight and scratchy. And holy tamoley, is it itching right now!

I think I just have to let it go. Take it off, put it all down, and start fresh. Get to know everyone and everything as I am now and not just autopilot off the past.

Here goes nothing… xo

This Is What I've Been Saying...

Broken Heart

When it rains, it pours?

In April, the older Glitter Pup - my first baby - suddenly passed away. Just typing the words still makes me cry. I had just started to come to grips with my younger pup’s cancer when he decided to quietly slip away in the same resolute way that he lived his life, i.e. he was determined to be first :) 

Don't get me wrong... I love all my animals, but his absence has left a Grand Canyon-sized hole in my heart. I liken it to the way parents love their kids. You love them all equally, but have a different relationship with each. We had been together the longest and living without him still feels unthinkable most days. I find myself looking for him in the house or when we’re on walks. It just doesn’t feel normal to be without him.

I got him when I was in my early 20s, and we grew up together. He helped teach the other glitter animals our house rules, was the one to curl up next to me at night (the other three take turns now), and taught me absolutely everything about patience and caring for someone more than myself. He was my best friend.

When he first passed away, I couldn't even think about it without full-on ugly crying. (Sorry if you were the guy sitting next to me on that airplane Easter weekend. I apologize for the uncomfortable amount of tears, snot, and Kleenex you witnessed for six hours.)

Lately, however, I've been thinking about all the life lessons the G brood has taught me. Here are a few:

1      LIVE IN THE MOMENT – This one comes courtesy of Glitter Pup #2. She’s been so stoic about losing her bestie. I truly believe that she is sad, but she is definitely back to business as usual. I’m still a mess, but I think she has the right idea. We’re alive now and should make the most of every day.

2      SOMETIMES STEALTH WORKS/TIMING IS EVERYTHING – When Glitter Pup #1 was about 2, he was allowed in the dining room during Christmas dinner. He sat at the edge of the table, getting tons of praise for being such a good boy. Then, when everyone was talking/laughing/distracted he quietly stood on his hind legs and stole one piece of ham off of a platter. It is still the funniest thing that has ever happened at a family dinner.

3      THERE IS ALWAYS ROOM FOR MORE LOVE – I never set out to have four animals. Only Glitter Pup #2 was a planned addition. The other three came into my life in random ways. Each time I was so nervous, but it always has worked out and I’m so incredibly grateful for each one of them. They were meant to be a part of our family and have taught me to approach life with a more open heart.

To my little man, you were the biggest heart wrapped up in a tiny beagle body. I miss you every single second of every single day.

Morning Reading

Two things you should know about me - 1) I love Silicon Valley & 2) I love food.

This makes me so happy!
https://food52.com/blog/19747-pinterest-just-launched-a-shazam-for-food

Weekly: Maintenance

Basic.

Have You Tried This?

I saw the Olay Skin Advisor in a magazine when I was getting my hair done, and had to do it! It's a little silly, but really fun. (And I like that it thinks I'm five years younger than I really am 😏)

Let me know if you try it out!

When Did This Happen?

Not that I haven't always liked Top Shop, but seriously? When did they get such great shoes?

This is the pair that started me looking, but they're kinda pricey.

Then I saw these... Not normally my style, but they also tie up the ankle and seem fun for summer. Also, they're more affordable. 

Then I saw this pair.  So simple and classic!

                                                                 

These are just HOT.

                                                                 

I'm obviously not going to buy them all, but I can't decide between the middle two pairs. I think I'd get a lot of use out of both. Decisions!

Thoughts on 13 Reasons Why...

Just finished 13 Reasons Why on Netflix. I had the time to binge it, but couldn't bring myself to. It was too rough and emotionally draining. It was perfectly imperfect, and should be required viewing (including the Beyond The Reasons feature) for anyone with or who works with teenagers. High school can be an unforgiving place, and this series captured the essence of it so very well.

There are a lot of tough-to-watch moments in this series, and I'm sure some will argue that these things don't need to be seen on screen. Their reasons are definitely understood, however, I'm wondering now if it wasn't a good thing that the creative team covered them in such a graphic way? By their very nature, these events are terribly painful. I think it's good to feel that once in awhile - that uncomfortableness, the rawness -  of those moments. It changes you.

I was horrified, then sobbing. But, as the credits rolled I was left with one feeling: Be kinder.

What would our world be like if we were all a little nicer to others and a little less self-serving? I'd be willing to bet we'd all be be better off. At the very least, I think we owe it to ourselves to try.

Deciem Skincare Is Pretty Much The Greatest Find Ever

I had been hearing rumblings online about this skincare company, Deciem, for quite awhile before I placed an order in January. They are an umbrella for 16 (from what I saw on their website) different brands and let me just tell you, I now want to try every single item they offer!

I ordered three products - one from Niod, one of the more expensive brands, and two from The Ordinary, which is much more budget-friendly. All three are in very sleek, clean packaging. None have crazy scents or made me break out. And, most importantly, they all work insanely well.

I love the philosophy behind The Ordinary - "Clinical Formulations with Integrity." Their products are full of tried and true ingredients. Nothing too out-of-the-box, just simple formulas that produce good results. The retinoid I bought (for $10, btw) is the same level as prescribed by my dermatologist, and the moisturizer (around $6) is chock full of lipids and hyaluronic acid.

 I ended up buying Hydration Vaccine ($55) from Niod, the more clinical and "fancier" brand in the range. I loved to see that it was vegan and a had neutral pH, but put it in my cart because it claimed to help skin look 20 years younger :) No joke - I stopped reading the description at that line and didn't see that it had some silicone in it. Because of that, I use it in the morning and it is seriously is the best priming moisturizer ever. It's just perfect. I literally find myself touching my face after I use it because it feels so... nice? I can't describe it but it's so good!

Now that I'm in my 30s, I'm obsessed with skincare and cannot say enough good things about these products. I don't know about you, but cutesy packaging only does so much for me. I mean, it's nice to look at and I like it a lot, but I want things that actually live up to their (mostly self-professed) claims.   Deciem is so worth it. You get so much bang for your buck. Definitely check them out!

Returning.

Hi there.

It's been awhile. I've missed this space and hope you've missed me, too.

Where to begin? I was so happy to home with my family this winter. The end of the 2016 had been rough, and I was looking to make some changes and regain some balance. I had planned to go back to LA (where I live) in January, but two days before I planned to leave, my mom got very sick. The next two months are a blur of doctor's appointments, ER visits, and medications. I took a job on a pilot in Chicago (where I'm from & where I am now) during that period because I needed/wanted to go back to work, and even though she was mostly recovered, she still needed some help. Everything seemed fine. The plan was to finish the job and head back to California.

Then, 5 weeks ago, everything changed. The younger of the Glitter Pups was diagnosed with lymphoma. If you knew me in real life, you would know I live for my dogs. They are the first faces that I see in the morning and the last I see at night. They are my best friends. I like people and all, I just love my dogs more ;) And so, when one of them is given 4-6 weeks to live, it broke me.

Even if you're not a dog person, I've bet you've been where I am now. In one of those spaces in between the present and the future, where every moment seems to matter so much and yet nothing seems real. I wake up wondering if every day is her last day while simultaneously Googling cancer treatment protocols and random vitamins that might make her live longer, all while not sleeping to make sure she's still breathing - I generally feel nuts.

I feel it in my bones that what's happening now is one of those things that will divide my life into a "before" and "after." I know it. My heart is totally shattered. And, most days, the words just aren't coming. Who am I kidding? Most days I can barely breathe.

So, please bear with me. I'll try my best to not be so absent. I have a pretty big backlog of posts to finish up, but I'll post them as soon and as often as I can. I've been holding on to so many exciting things. I can't wait to share them with you!


Thanks for being understanding & all my love,
G.

Bookshelf

Considering that a good chunk of my time has been spent waiting in doctors' offices lately, I feel like I should be reading more than I actually am right now. Here's what I finished last week:

The Girls in the Garden is beautifully written and a little surprising. The graphic novel was just for fun. (If you haven't read the actual book, STOP EVERYTHING YOU'RE DOING and start reading it!! NOW!!) 

   

Here is what I'm reading now:

I lovelovelove Jennifer Weiner's work, and was super excited to start this memoir. Originally, I started with written book, but stopped and checked out the audio version from the library (via Overdrive) instead. She reads it and it's endeared her to me even more.

This one is from Book of the Month. The blurb sounded awesome and I wanted to give it a try. It's a little too early to tell, but great so far.